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Embracing Peace: Why Friendship Drama Becomes Less Appealing as We Age

As we journey through life, our priorities shift, and our perspectives evolve. One significant change many of us experience as we reach a certain age is a growing aversion to the drama often associated with some friendships.

I know that personally I ensure that if someone brings overwhelming stress to my table, they are no longer welcome. I can and I will prioritize myself and my personal well-being over the chaos of someone else’s chaotic life.

The Allure of Simplicity in Friendships

As we grow older, we begin to recognize that stressful friend dynamics can be draining.

We start to appreciate simplicity and authenticity in our relationships. The appeal of deep, meaningful connections becomes far more desirable than the fleeting excitement of drama.

Many individuals find themselves gravitating toward friends who bring positivity and support rather than those who contribute to stress and tension.

Prioritizing Mental Well-being Over Friendship Drama

As we mature, we face various life challenges—career pressures, family responsibilities, and health concerns. These factors heighten our awareness of mental health. We begin to understand the importance of surrounding ourselves with individuals who uplift us instead of those who bring drama into our lives.

Friendship drama can lead to anxiety, resentment, and emotional fatigue. As we age, we learn to prioritize our mental health and seek relationships that foster calm and support.

The desire for a peaceful life becomes paramount, and we become adept at recognizing friendships that enrich our lives rather than drain our energy.

Setting Healthy Boundaries in Friendships

Another vital aspect of this shift is the establishment of healthy boundaries. With age comes wisdom, and we learn that it’s acceptable to say “no” to relationships that no longer serve us.

We become more skilled at identifying toxic dynamics and are less inclined to tolerate behavior that disrupts our peace.

This doesn’t mean we abandon our friends when conflicts arise; rather, we approach friendships with a discerning eye. We understand that it’s okay to distance ourselves from those who thrive on drama or engage in constant negativity.

By setting boundaries, we create space for healthier, more fulfilling connections.

The Joy of Quiet Companionship

As we embrace this new phase of life, we often find joy in quieter, more stable friendships. These relationships are characterized by mutual respect, understanding, and a shared desire for peace. Activities like enjoying a quiet cup of coffee, going for a nature walk, or simply being in comfortable silence become cherished moments.

In this phase, we learn to appreciate the value of companionship without the need for constant excitement. The comfort of being with someone who understands us without the need for dramatic exchanges is a beautiful realization that often comes with maturity.

Finding Peace in Friendship

Reaching a certain age often brings a profound shift in our approach to friendships. The drama that once seemed thrilling can become burdensome, leading us to seek a quieter, more peaceful existence.

By prioritizing mental well-being, setting healthy boundaries, and embracing meaningful connections, we create a life that reflects our values and desires.

In the end, friendship, in its simplest form, is about connection—one that enriches our lives without the unnecessary chaos.

Embracing this phase can lead to deeper, more fulfilling relationships that nurture our souls and allow us to thrive in the serenity we crave.

Let’s celebrate this journey toward a peaceful life, where friendship drama becomes a distant memory, and tranquility reigns supreme. featured image credit:ktpaperdesigns

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Embracing Life: Celebrating Victory Over Breast Cancer

In the grand narrative of life, there are chapters that test our resilience, chapters that redefine our strength, and chapters that celebrate our triumphs. Today, as I sit down to share my story, I find myself basking in the radiant glow of victory, for I am officially free from breast cancer.

The journey has been nothing short of tumultuous, a rollercoaster of emotions, fears, and hopes. Yet, through the darkest nights and the brightest days, I have not merely survived; I have thrived. With unwavering determination and boundless courage, I confronted each obstacle head-on, refusing to let adversity define me.

Just recently, I received the long-awaited results from my PET & CT scans and blood tests—a testament to the relentless pursuit of healing and the power of resilience. No sign of breast cancer! *happy dance*

The non-Hodgkin’s Lymphoma, once scattered throughout my abdominal area like ominous clouds, has regressed. Several nodes have shrunk, one has vanished entirely, leaving behind whispers of hope and whispers of gratitude.

Yet, amidst the triumph, there lingers one stubborn node, a reminder that life’s battles are not always easily won. But as they say, there’s always one, isn’t there?

In this moment of celebration, I find myself overwhelmed with gratitude, for I have not walked this path alone. To my healthcare providers, whose care and remarkable skill have been beacons of light in the darkest of times, I extend my deepest appreciation. Your unwavering dedication has been the cornerstone of my journey, guiding me towards healing and restoration.

To my gym trainers and gym buddies, who stood by me through the toughest of workouts and the most challenging of days, your encouragement fueled my spirit and strengthened my resolve. In your company, I found solace and strength, forging bonds that transcend mere friendship.

To my beautiful daughter, my rock amidst the raging storm, your love and unwavering support have been my greatest source of strength. In your eyes, I found the courage to press on, to fight fiercely, and to never lose sight of the beauty that lies beyond the shadows.

And to my dance community and friends, whose laughter and camaraderie lit up even the darkest of nights, your unwavering support and boundless love lifted my spirits and carried me through the storm. In your company, I found the courage to dance amidst the rain, to embrace life’s melodies, and to celebrate each precious moment.

As I stand on the threshold of a new beginning, I am reminded that life’s greatest victories are not measured by the battles we win, but by the love we share, the friendships we cherish, and the moments we hold dear. In the tapestry of life, every thread, every triumph, and every tear, weaves together to form the masterpiece of our existence.

Today, as I embrace the warmth of the sun and the gentle caress of the wind, I am reminded of the beauty that lies within each moment, the magic that resides within each heartbeat.

In my life, amidst the laughter and the tears, there lies the promise of a new beginning, a promise of hope, and a promise of love.

And so, as I bid farewell to the shadows of yesterday and embrace the light of tomorrow, I do so with a heart full of gratitude, a spirit renewed, and a soul ablaze with the fire of resilience.

imagecredit:NukeP

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The Covenant that ties…

What is family? Who do you count as family? Is it just blood ties or do you have friends that you consider family?

This time of year we are close to Christmas and in the US it is Thanksgiving time. Both occasions are all about family, times of love & happiness, but can also be fraught with conflict and discord.

My daughter is my family and we love each other dearly. I also have family on the other side of the country. Family for me includes close friends. One friend hosts an “orphans” Christmas breakfast at the beach each year (we live in Australia, so Christmas is peak summertime for us!).

Having been married twice, I also have extended family. My first husband’s sister is someone I will always consider family, even though our connection is no longer via the marriage bond, she is someone I hold dear. My second husband and I are still friends (years after we divorced) and always will be and I remained close with his mother until she passed.

A previous partner, however, had a very tumultuous and toxic family. Always feuding with each other. Always threatening each other and sending abusive messages to each other. They thought that was normal. I was both appalled and aghast when shown the vitriol that was sent back and forth. It was ugly!

Vicious name calling and I mean vicious, no foul language was off limits! Abuse & threats were sent back & forth in equal measure. I had never in all my life witnessed such toxic behaviour, ever!! And I hope I never do again. Even reading such sickening messages was emotionally damaging and they were not aimed at me.

No-one in my life, family or friends, have ever spoken to me or me to them in the horrid and abusive way of this mob. It was insane! They have behaved like this for many, many years and amongst themselves they have normalized this abusive and damaging behavior. None of them cared about the damage they inflicted on each other, it was harrowing to witness. My then partner was regularly brought to tears of grief and despair – then he would fire back equally vile messages in retaliation! It was nuts!

Those people made it very clear that I was NOT family, regardless of my being in a relationship with one of theirs for some time. Praise be for that I say! Never would I wish to be known as belonging to such toxic people. They were all big on “blood is thicker than water” – clearly an excuse for toxic and damaging behaviour towards each other. The kicker is that they (and many other people) have got that expression totally wrong. They think it means ties of blood/kin are stronger than ties of “water” or non-kin.

However, the actual expression is “The blood of the Covenant is thicker than the water of the womb.” As in bonds that you’ve made by choice are more important than the people that you are bound to by the water of the womb. Here’s a link that explains the original Covenant quote.

I hope however you celebrate Thanksgiving and Christmas that you are surrounded by loving, kind and genuine folk who care for you as you care for them, whether they are ties of the womb or Covenant of blood. 💕

imagecredit:Margienance

 

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